My Last Day of Radiation

*I've been working on this post for a couple of days now.  My fatigue has really increased since last Wednesday - probably because my stress level increased that day too.  Sorry for the delay.  I can't wait to share with you what God has been doing!  Please bare with me as I try to get caught up.  It will take several posts to share everything God has laid on my heart, so please keep checking back.  Also, I have a follow-up appointment with my surgeon today (Tuesday) to discuss future treatment, etc.

Thursday 3/3/11 was my very last day of radiation.  After going to treatment for 6 1/2 weeks, the people there became my friends.  I am going to miss them.  And because of them, last Thursday was a very emotional day.

This is Jessica.  She is a student who I would see every MWF.  She was always smiling, and she took good care of me.  Remember when I had to get tattooed and I asked them if they could do a cross?  Well, every time Jessica would help set me up (there were 3 different marks that had to line up on the radiation machine via light beams), she would say "I know her vert (one of the marks) is crisscross."  The first time I heard her say that, I said "I knew I was going to get my CROSS!!!  I knew it!  Everytime yall set me up, yall see a cross!"  GOD IS SO GOOD!

This is John - the only male except for Dr. Bobo.  Bless him!  He is great and has a wonderful sense of humor.  This is Ms. Rachel beside him.  This was her last day too!  Sweet lady who loves the Lord and knows about His tender provision.

Here is the rest of the crew.  (I took Jessica & John's pictures a day or 2 early because they were not going to be there on Thursday.)  Below are the other radiation techs: (L to R: Jessica, Tami & April)

(Back Row L to R: Donna, Nurse Kitty, Tami, Jessica; Front L to R: Nurse Vanessa & April)

Amazing people.  I miss them already!  One of my buddies, Tonya, was out sick so I will take her picture when I have my follow-up appointment on April 1.

God gave me some special time with these ladies too.  The entire 6 1/2 weeks I had treatment, patients were being seen every 10 minutes!  It was always busy.  However, several of us in the afternoon all finished last week.  So, after my actual treatment on Thursday at 2:40pm, the next patient wasn't scheduled until 3:30pm.  I had the entire staff to myself for about 30 minutes!  ONLY GOD!

When you "graduate," they have a little "ceremony" for you involving stones.  I was handed a bowl and asked to pick out a stone.  I wanted a purple one but couldn't find one.  A unique white one caught my eye, so I chose it.  Then the staff gathered around me and Nurse Kitty said, " In history In the BIBLE, stones were used for a lot of things like weapons and tools, but they were also used for memorials.  And that is what your stone is for.....it is a memorial of your journey."  She said lots of other things that made me cry!  And she cried right along with me.

After the ceremony, I put my stone in a bowl filled with lots of other stones from people who had also completed treatment. 

As I was taking this picture, I made mention that God had just told me on Tuesday to make a memory book about something else in my life (my call to minister to Africa) so that when times get tough in the future & I start to question whether or not God really wants me ministering there, I can pull out my memory book (memorial stone) and know for sure it was His call.  Then Nurse Kitty said, "You know God told His people to do that time and time again in the Bible.  He did it so they would always remember His faithfulness."

Then she said, "Nancy, you need to pick out a stone to take with you."  I said, "Why don't you pick one out for me?"  Here is the stone she handed me.....

It is PURPLE!!!  She gave me the purple one I couldn't find!  In that moment here is what God brought to my mind: 

The white stone (that I chose and put in the bowl) represents newness of life, starting over, a new season, being a new creation because of Christ.  When we invite Jesus Christ into our lives, His blood on the cross washes away our sins and makes us whiter than snow.  Jesus makes us pure, blameless, righteous, holy. 

The same thing happens every time we repent and ask God to forgive us of our sins (after salvation.)  It is so important that we confess our sins DAILY and stay close to Him - otherwise our sin will separate us from Him & His best for us. Through His forgiveness, we are given a clean slate, a new beginning, freedom, another opportunity to serve Him for His glory.  

As for the purple, it represents royalty in the Bible.  When we accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we become part of His family.  We become Daughters of the King.  Sons of the King.  Purple reminds us of who we belong to because of Christ and who we are in Christ.  We have "spiritual royalty" because of our Savior.

Jesus said, "I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of My hand. My Father, who has given them to Me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of My Father’s hand."  John 10:28-29   

And once we are adopted into God's family, no one or no thing can take us away from Him. PERIOD. We belong to Him. WE ARE HIS CHILDREN.

So the white stone and the purple stone were used by God to remind me of who I am in Christ and what He has done and will continue to do in my life.  (This leads right into what God gave me for my birthday on Monday.  I will share that in another post.)

Imagine my surprise and tears when I pulled up in front of my house on Monday and found this...THANK YOU TO THE SWEET SECRET PERSON(S) WHO DID THIS FOR ME!!!  WOW!

Beautiful flowers in PURPLE and WHITE!!!  ONLY GOD!  ONLY GOD!  I am overwhelmed.  So undeserving.  Yet, He continues to love me and speak to me.  And so many times, He does it through YOU!  

Like when you bring me and my family dinner....

This mystery person is Sheri J. from church.  She is beautiful but had been working around her house all day and felt a little camera shy.  This picture was our compromise! THANK YOU SO MUCH SHERI!!!  It was absolutely delicious!  THANK YOU!

Then a surprise dinner arrived from my friend Mendy.  THANK YOU MENDY!  YUMMY!!!  What a blessing it was - I was gone both Friday & Saturday nights during dinner but God used Mendy to feed my family!  (I ate some for lunch myself!) THANK YOU! 

God provides for our needs in amazing ways, doesn't He?  

Standing in awe of HIM,
Nancy    

Some lessons I've learned while being...

 Everything feels like a chore, even fun things
eXpectations must be lowered - this does wonders for your priorities
 Have to take care of yourself - no one else can do that for you
 Allow others to HELP - God gave us each other for a reason
 Unable to do it all - we were never meant to do it all in the 1st place
 Saying NO to things, even good things, is OK
 To Do list probably won't get done but the world will keep spinning
 lEt yourself off the hook - it will decrease your stress level
 Delegate, delegate, delegate - invite others to learn & take part

I woke up this morning exhausted.  Not the way you want to start your day.  My vision was blurry from the time I opened my eyes.  Odd.  That was a first. 

After taking my daughter to school and walking with my friend Cindy, MOPS and work were on my schedule. I made it to MOPS but halfway through, I just had to close my eyes.  It was craft day so I decided to finish my craft at home.  I needed to reserve any energy I could possibly muster up for work.  My group leader did not want me to drive!!!

When I got in my car, I knew I had to go to sleep.  My body was demanding it.  So, I called my aunt about work, and she graciously told me to take care of myself.  Wise advice.  I got home at noon and went to bed until 2:30pm!

Initially I could not fall asleep, but just being able to close my eyes and rest did wonders!!!  While I was lying there, God gave me the acrostic for exhausted.  I have to admit, it feels really strange to actually take care of myself like this.  I can't tell you the last time I missed work for me and not my children (being sick & or having appointments.)  Fortunately, I was too tired to feel guilty!  

Our bodies are the only temple we have.  It is up to us to take care of them.  Without feeling guilty!  So what are you doing to take care of YOUSELF today?  I challenge you to DO SOMETHING!  God said so.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit,

who is in you, whom you have received from God?

You are not your own;   you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body."  1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

The Big Day

Today was a big day in the Swicegood household...

TANNER GOT BRACES!!!!! He did great!  It was only suppose to take about an hour & a half.  But, it ended up taking 3 hours!  His orthodontist said they put nearly every device possible in his mouth!  He is quite sore, poor thing.

He has to wear 3 rubberbands - 2 all the time and 1 at night only.  When the dental assistant was giving us instructions on where to put all of them, she said "the one he wears at night makes a RAINBOW."   Tanner and I just looked at each other and smiled.  What a special reminder of God's presence every night when Tanner puts the rubberband in!  ONLY GOD! 

*The orthodontist called tonight after dinner to check on Tanner too!  That speaks volumes to me.  So if you are looking for an orthodontist, I highly recommend Dr. Thomas & Dr. Leitner.  Great people.

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And I FINISHED RADIATION TODAY!  It was very emotional.  I am REALLY going to miss the radiation staff.  They did something very special for me too.  I can't wait to share that with you - when I can see straight!  I am drained.  Hopefully, I'll be able to share in the morning.  If not, I'll do it on Saturday.  I'll also share with you the special people God used to provide meals for us today!  Ohhh, we are SO blessed!  Good night.

"And my God will meet all your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Philippians 4:19

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,

Nancy

31 down and 2 more to go

Good morning!

I can't believe that I only have 2 more treatments to go!  Time really does go by so fast. 

Yesterday was doctor day.  Dr. Bobo told me what to expect after my treatments stop.  He said that it will take up to a month for me to get most of my energy back.  He warned me that I will probably feel okay for the 1st week and then get hit pretty hard with fatigue again.  He said it's like being on a roller coaster.  Fun Times!

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My friend Shawna Lee and her 2 children brought us dinner on Monday.  It was SO GOOD!!!  THANK YOU MY FRIEND!

Here is Topher and Katie with my daughter's bird Bishop.  It is always good to spend some time with friends!

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy
 

I got a boost today....

of radiation, not energy - definitely NOT engery. 

Because I have one week of radiation left, my treatment changed today.  Now, only my scar area from surgery will receive radiation, and this is called a boost.

I could really tell a difference today.  Let's just say before I even walked out of the radiology office this afternoon, I was already yawning.  I could feel the effects that quickly.  I.Am.Exhausted.

Good Night.

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

  

     

All you have to do is ASK

Every evening during dinner, my family and I go around the table and share something (nice) we did for someone else that day.  It can be as simple as holding the door open for someone.  It's not hard, but it is intentional.  It helps us to be mindful of the needs around us and actually DO SOMETHING about them.

Yesterday, I went to radiation early so I could get finished early and run an errand.  As I was getting out of my car, I gathered up some trash from my cupholder so I could throw it away in the trash can by the front door.  As I walked through the parking area, I saw a large piece of trash on the ground.  My first thought was "if I pick that up and throw it away with my trash, I can tell my family that's what I did for someone today.  I would be saving the grounds keeper from having to pick it up."

But, my next thought was "God, I want to do more than that today.  I want to interact with someone.  I finish radiation next Thursday, and I know You still have people You want me to reach out to.  Use me, Lord."

Well, I did not have to wait long at all for God to answer my prayer!!!  About 30 seconds later as I approached the front door, I saw an elderly man sitting in a wheelchair waiting to be picked up.  So, I spoke to him.  He told me he was waiting for his ride, but she had never been there before and did not know how to find him.  He explained that she had parked at the front of the hospital, and he was now on the far side of the campus.

I asked him if he wanted me to walk around to the front to find her.  He said "YES!"  So, I had him describe the car to me so I would know what I was looking for.  Then he said, "You will see a young lady with a purple blouse on."  I naturally assumed his granddaughter must be the one picking him up.

As I headed around the building, I saw an elderly lady trying to step from the parking lot up onto the sidewalk.  She was having some trouble.  So, I asked her if I could help, and she used me to pull herself up onto the sidewalk.

I then continued on my quest to find a young lady driving a 2007 silver Honda.  I actually made it all the way to the front of the hospital before I spotted a car that fit the description.  But, there were 2 people inside.  Huh, must not be the right car.  Then, I saw the purple blouse in the driver's seat, and a security guard in the passenger's seat!  The young lady I had been told to look for was completely white headed!!!!!  HOW SWEET!  It was his wife!  I hope my husband refers to me as a YOUNG lady when we are in our 70s and 80s! 

Anyway, "the young lady" had gotten the security guard to ride with her to help her find her husband.  I flagged the car down and told the security guard exactly where his driver was trying to go.  I then headed back to the elderly gentleman to tell him his ride was on her way.  He was so thankful and said "I don't know what I would have done.  I was lost but now I'm found!"  What a perfect segue for me to talk about God and give Him the glory for putting us in each other's path.

I finally made it into radiation only to learn they were running behind.  So, I actually had a chance to meet someone new and talk to 3 other ladies I already knew while I waited!  That has not happened in awhile.    

After my treatment, I walked out of the building and started heading towards my car and guess who I saw?  The same elderly lady who I had helped onto the sidewalk!!!  Now, she needed help getting off the sidewalk and onto the parking lot.  So, I ran to catch up with her and asked if I could help again.  She graciously accepted my offer.  Once she was safely in her car, she looked at me and said "You are an angel!"  I'm thinking, "And you are an answer to my prayer!"

We ended up talking in the parking lot for over 30 minutes!!!  She even gave me her phone number so we can get together in the future!  And she let me pray for her before she left! 

Needless to say, that errand I was suppose to run yesterday is still on my To Do list today, but God gave me a new 83 year old friend instead!!!

Talk about a Divine Interruption!  ONLY GOD!

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

Ouch! That Brick Wall Hurts!

About 10 days ago (Wed. 2/9/11 to be exact), I hit a mental brick wall.  My fatigue got the best of me.  I did not know what to do, so I just cried!  Honestly, I was too tired to do anything else.

I've never experienced fatigue like this before.  It's not like being tired and needing a nap or a good night's sleep.  It is cumulative.  It keeps adding to itself every day. 

My friend Shawn Lee explained it by using the "spoon theory."  She said it's like waking up in the morning and having 7 spoons to give out during the day.  The spoons represent your energy.  Once all of your spoons have been used or given away, there are no more!  You are done for the day!  You have to wait until the next day to get more spoons.

AMEN SISTER!

People look at you on the outside and think you are fine, especially the people closest to you who really want you to be fine.  But, they have no idea what is taking place on the inside.  The battle with fatigue is real and it is fierce!

I strongly believe I am experiencing such fatigue as an answer to one of my prayers - "God  break my heart for what breaks Your heart."  He is allowing me to have this encounter with fatigue so I can relate to many others who are engaged in the same battle.  He is giving me new insight and compassion.  He is broadening my ability to understand and sympathize.

"All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us."  2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Satan wants nothing more than for us to isolate ourselves when we are struggling.  He wants us to put on our masks and pretend everything is okay when it's not.  We tend to isolate when we feel no one will understand.  Or when we believe we are in this all alone.  Or when we think we are the only person going through this situation.  Along with numerous other lies we convince ourselves are true. 

Isolation can lead to depression which can lead to hopelessness, etc.  God's heart breaks for people caught in the web of satan's lies.   We were not put on this earth to be alone!!!!  We were made to be in relationships - first with Jesus Christ our Savior and then with other people.  We were made to reach out to one another and help each other - in good times and in bad.

The numerous and creative ways that YOU have ministered to me and my family during my season of cancer are exactly what God had in mind.  YOU ARE A LIVING TESTIMONY TO GOD'S WORD!!!  THANK YOU!  THANK YOU!  THANK YOU!

Now, if I can just stay far, far away from that brick wall, I will be fine!  The other day, it was waiting for me on the freezer aisle at Wal-Mart, and I ran smack dab into it face first!  Not pretty.  Hopefully, I won't do that again!  I am learning my limits.  Please pray that I will stay within my limits withOUT feeling guilty.

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

The Perfect Place for Perfectionists

Every Monday at radiation is "picture" day.  X-rays are taken to ensure nothing has changed, and everything is still lining up correctly.  They want to make certain the radiation is going to the right place!

Picture day takes longer and requires me to lay still on the table until they have made any necessary adjustments.  This past Monday, something wasn't lining up the way they wanted it to so I had to remain motionless for about 30 minutes until they figured it out.  Normally, I am only on the table for 5 minutes or less.

When I arrived on Tuesday, I was told Dr. Bobo, my radiologist, wanted one more picture.  It ended up taking over 30 minutes this time, and Dr. Bobo even came in to make sure I was set up correctly.  Two pictures were exactly right, but the third one was off.  So, they were making all kinds of adjustments to correct it.

The staff is absolutely wonderful!  They were apologizing for the delay and constantly checking on me.  I told them not to worry about me.  Radiation is the ONLY place I can go and hear these words... "You just relax and let us do ALL the work." 

I have to go to radiation everyday just to get some rest!  

Anyway, once I was finally adjusted, "art class" began.  All of my markings were updated and covered with new stickers.  The staff explained that the adjustments they have to make are all in MILLIMETERS - tiny, tiny, tiny.  They apologized again for being so picky.  I thanked them for it.

FINALLY, THE PERFECT PLACE FOR PERFECTIONISTS!!!  Maybe I should consider changing careers... 

Note to self - don't assume that Monday is the only long day on the table at radiation.  If you have been drinking water all day and think you may need the little girl's room then go BEFORE your treatment.  Don't think "I can wait 5 more minutes."  Five minutes just may turn into 35 minutes!  I'm just saying... 

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy
     

You know you are having a good day when...

Battling fatigue from radiation is tougher than I thought it would be.  I've been so mentally drained lately that it has literally brought me to tears!  Being a task-oriented person does not help much either!

But, God's presence and strength are sustaining me.  He is taking care of everything, and He has plans to use it all for His glory!  

So, I thought it would be good to do a little reflecting on some of the things God has done to help me keep things in perspective.  And this verse keeps playing over and over in my mind...    "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." Philippians 4:8


You know you are having a good day when...

* You get to witness God answering prayers - MY BROTHER SHANE CAME HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL YESTERDAY - VALENTINE'S DAY!!!  Talk about LOVE!  YAY GOD!!! 


* You dash out of the house without grabbing anything for lunch only to get to work and be told by your cousin Allyson, "We are having lunch at the office today for Valentine's at noon.  I just ordered Chick-fil-a nuggets and chicken salad sandwiches from your husband."  Talk about GOD'S PROVISION!!!

* You muster up enough courage to check your mailbox (after a few days) and are delighted to find NO MEDICAL BILLS!

Instead, you find a precious card from a praying friend who has been asking God to give you exactly what you need - STRENGTH!!!  And she added an extra treat inside.  Talk about A BLESSING!

THANK YOU KRISTIN!!!

And why would someone be afraid to check their mail, you ask.  Well, maybe because the last time she did, she received 6 MEDICAL BILLS in one day!!!  Talk about OVERWHELMING!

Just a little free advice - anytime you receive a medical bill, you should call the billing department to make sure everything is correct.  We have found that some claims were not filed with the insurance company by mistake, were not coded correctly (which ended up cutting our bill in half!), could be negotiated, etc.  Make the call.  It is worth it!


* You are soooo tired you can't see straight and someone shows up at your door with dinner for you and your family.  Talk about BEING THE HANDS AND FEET OF JESUS!

THANK YOU BARBARA!  YOUR CASSEROLE WAS DELICIOUS!

* You conspire to surprise and kidnap your friend on her birthday and it works!  Talk about BEING A GOOD SPORT!  Cindy had gotten all comfy thinking she was in for the night! NOT!!

* Your friend leaves you homemade chicken noodle soup in her mailbox so you can pick it up during your early morning walk through her neighborhood.  Talk about being a TRUE FRIEND! 

THANK YOU SHAWNA LEE!!!

And these are only a few things that God has done!  When we keep our focus on Him, He helps us keep our perspective - even in the midst of our difficult circumstances. 

LOVE HIM!
CLING TO HIM!
TRUST HIM! 
RELY ON HIM! 
OBEY HIM!

HE IS WORTH IT!

Loving HIM with all  my heart & soul,
Nancy

More and More Blessings

It is tough being a night person and trying to learn to be a morning person!  I have so much I want to get done in the morning, but time runs out.  In the evenings, I am so tired I have to go to sleep.  Please pray that I am able to get the important things done and able to let the other things go until radiation is finished.  IT IS HARD!

Also, for the first time since I started radiation, I actually got tired at work yesterday.  At about 11:30am I started yawning every few minutes and needed a nap.  Prior to this, I only got tired after radiation in the afternoons.  I am praying that yesterday was only a one time thing and not the new trend!  I do bookkeeping and it is the first of the month (BUSY BUSY BUSY) so I can't be tired at work right now!

But God is so faithful and takes such good care of me!  When I got home yesterday, I had a little surprise waiting for me....

THANK YOU SHARON and FAMILY!!!!!  What a peace of mind to have a meal in the freezer for whenever we need it most!  And how did you know that we were already out of oranges??!!!  Not to mention the gorgeous flowers - a sign of new life.  THANK YOU SO MUCH!  Your surprise blessed me more than you will ever know.

Then, dinner arrived from these 3 beautiful young ladies!  THANK YOU!!!

Mexican - my favorite!!!  YUMMY!!!  THANK YOU AUDREY and FAMILY!!!  WHAT A BLESSING and ENCOURAGEMENT YOU ARE TO ME!  THANK YOU DEAR FRIEND!

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

More Blessings

Update on my brother Shane

Huge praise!  Shane went for 3 days without getting sick!  YAY GOD!  The doctors also think they have FINALLY discovered the problem: his vagus nerve was disturbed during surgery.  Here is a little something I read about the vagus nerve which is a nerve that extends from the brain to the abdomen:
 
"The vagus nerve helps to regulate the heart beat, control muscle movement, keep a person breathing, and to transmit a variety of chemicals through the body. It is also responsible for keeping the digestive tract in working order, contracting the muscles of the stomach and intestines to help process food, and sending back information about what is being digested and what the body is getting out of it."

Shane has started eating broth, jello,  etc.  On Sunday, he started getting nauseous again and got a little sick.  Yesterday, he only got sick once.  This is HUGE!  God gets ALL the glory!  PLEASE KEEP PRAYING FOR PROGRESS! 

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On Sunday morning as we were leaving for church, my next door neighbor came running out of his house with a bag in his hand.  He handed my husband the bag and said, "Someone left this on our door last night at midnight, and it has a card with Nancy's name on it."  My husband graciously accepted the bag and explained to my neighbor that I had breast cancer and people like to bring things by to help me.

Here is what was in the bag....

Talk about a TRUE friend!  Making sure I eat my fruits and vegetables!  You made my mom proud (& yours too!)

And the fact that the bag was left on my neighbor's door was a God thing!  You see, about 2 days before this, I heard something on the radio about "How well do you know your neighbors?"  I thought to myself, I'm dealing with cancer and most of them are unaware.  So what are my neighbors dealing with that I'm clueless about?  What opportunities am I missing to be able to reach out to them?

The neighbors who came to my mind first were the ones who got my bag.  They have a 2 year old and are expecting their 2nd child soon.  The 2 year old has been sick so I honestly haven't seen her or her mom in weeks.  I've been so caught up in making sure I do not get sick during radiation that I've neglected an opportunity to minister to my neighbors.

What about you?  Do you know your neighbors?  Do you REALLY know what is happening in their lives?  Are you reaching out to them? 

And to cap it all off, I heard the story of the Good Samaritan on the radio yesterday.  God is definitely speaking!  It's time to TAKE ACTION!  DO SOMETHING for your neighbors! 

Jesus said, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and, Love your neighbor as yourself.”  Luke 10:27

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Speaking of doing something, last night Kristin from MOPS brought us dinner!  THANK YOU KRISTIN!!!  We literally wiped it out in no time flat!  I am not kidding.  No leftovers for lunch today :(

THANK YOU ALL FOR LOVING ME AND MY FAMILY!  Thank you for your prayers.  Thank you for your e-mails.  Thank you for your cards.  Thank you for the meals.  Thank you for the phone calls.  Thank you for your sincere offers to help in any way you can.  Thank you for your surprises.  Thank you for everything.  THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!  You are the hands and feet of Jesus to us.

"A generous person will prosper;
   whoever refreshes others will be refreshed."

Proverbs 11:25

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

Blessings

UPDATE ON SALLY (as of Friday)

Sally's PET scan was clear. Praise the Lord! No other cancer. Her surgery went well today. She had a rod put into her femur and the tumor was removed. She will have radiation on that bone starting in a few weeks. She is resting now with her family at her side and will be home in a few days.

Thank You, Lord, for answering our prayers and taking such good care of our sweet sister in Christ.  Please continue to comfort her and heal her completely.  We give you all the praise and glory!  Amen.

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On Thursday afternoon, the doorbell rang.  I opened the door to find my neighbor and 2 of her children smiling back at me.  My neighbor is the one whose 4th grader is battling brain cancer.  I introduced her on my Jan. 8 post.

She said her son only has a week and a half left of radiation so he is very tired.  He is also taking oral chemotherapy at night.  What a brave young man!  She said he doesn't have much of an appetite, but he will eat this.....

Lemon yogurt pound cake!  YUMMY!!!

So she wanted to bring me some and see how I was doing with my radiation.  What a special blessing!  It made me cry!

Then, my friend Angela from MOPS brought us a box full of blessings for dinner and breakfast.

Did we really eat an entire loaf of fresh, warm bread at dinner, along with our chicken noodle soup and cupcake dessert (Grandma's recipe no doubt)??!!!

And check out these heart shaped muffins....talk about love!  I've been instructed by my children to get the recipe. 

THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH ANGELA!!!  THANK YOU!

Angela brought some pretty flowers too.  And here's my husband volunteering to taste test the cupcakes.  Life is short.  Eat dessert first!

Faith did not even let the box go to waste...she designed a hat out of it.  How creative!

I've been told it is still a work in progress, and by the looks of the floor in the computer room, I would believe it!  I'll take another picture when it's finished.

On Friday afternoon as soon as we got home, I had a surprise visit from my friend Cindy.  We haven't seen each other all week because she has been nursing her family back to health.  All 3 of her children and her husband have been sick.

And speaking of love and creativity, Cindy brought by some tasty treats she made.  She is very talented and has her own baking business to raise money for missions.  You can check it out here http://onmissioninthekitchen.blogspot.com/

THANK YOU CINDY!  

"Taste and see that the LORD is good;
blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him."  

Psalm 34:8

A quick raditation update...I have completed my 9th treatment - only 24 more to go!  Just starting to turn red and burn a little.  I'm usually ready for bed before 8pm!!! 

God is giving me lots of opportunities to talk with other women while I am at radiation.  How exciting!  So please keep praying for these developing relationships.  

I had to take Faith with me to treatment yesterday.  The incredible radiation staff let her see the Big Machine too.  I'm hoping this helps her understand everything a little better.  She has been mentioning death a lot lately.  And the other day on the way to school, she asked me if my cancer meant she was going to have cancer too.  

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation,
by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,
present your requests to God.
And the peace of God,

which transcends all understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds

in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:6-7 

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy

What a Difference a Day Makes

"In his heart a man plans his course,

but the LORD determines his steps."

Proverbs 16:9

8:13 a.m.
What a blessing it is to have my giddiness from God's activity yesterday spill over into the reality of today.  I am so glad that joy comes from the Lord and not circumstances! Aren't you?  (If you clicked onto my blog because of an e-mail I sent you, I wanted you to read MONDAY'S POST 1/24.) 

While I was upstairs getting ready for work this morning, I heard my phone, which was downstairs, ring with a text message.  I did not check it until I was ready to walk out the door.  To my surprise, it was my aunt (my boss) telling me that things at the office had been REALLY, REALLY slow and she wanted me to consider taking most, if not all, of this week off.

Interesting.

You see, I have been awake since 4:19 a.m. this morning anticipating an incredibly busy day.  I had asked God for extra strength and grace today so I could take care of my responsibilities and myself physically.  I had confessed to Him that I did not know how I was going to get it all done.  HE TOOK CARE OF THAT, DIDN'T HE??!!!  He is so good and faithful!

Unfortunately, not going to work means not getting paid.

Okay, I'm about to get a little personal here and talk about money. 

Cancer is not cheap!  The medical bills are streaming in.  The insurance we had last year STINKS and is not paying for very much at all.  A huge praise was that we were able to change insurance companies at the beginning of the year to have better coverage. 

However, my biopsies, MRI, and surgery all fall under the old company.  The bill for the operating room alone is over $16,000, and that does NOT include the surgeon, anesthesioloigst, radiologist, or pathologist.  And I was only there for a few hours!!!  I did get great care while I was there, but over $16,000??!!!  Really?  Come on!

My radiation and any further tests or appointments will be covered by the new company.  YEAH GOD!!!

But, with the new insurance comes a MAJOR increase in our insurance premium.  Our budget has taken a big hit.  We are cutting off cable, eating lots of PB&J, staying at home more, etc. to accommedate.  We are already on a cash budget, thanks to my Mom introducing us to Dave Ramsey several years ago.  We do not have any outstanding debt like credit cards, student loans, car payments, etc.  So, there is not much else we can cut to pay for all of these healthcare costs. 

Oh and did I mention that due to some substantial changes in the way Rapid Refund tax returns are handled this year, my aunt had to cut everyone's hours?  In the past, I have been on salary.  This year, I'm hourly and anticipate at least half of my usual income (probably more) to be cut.

I mentioned before that I've been looking for a 2nd job to earn money for missions.  After getting a taste of foreign missions last year, my heart has been forever changed, and I want to go on more trips in the future, along with my family.  Being diagnosed with cancer put getting a 2nd job on hold for awhile.  Now, medical bills threaten to thwart my desire to earn money for missions all together.  UGGHHH!  (I guess God does not want me to become self-reliant for missions yet.  It looks like He still wants me to step way out of my comfort zone and ask other people to support me.  Been there. Learned that. The hard way.)

Good news though.  I talked to my Dad last week and he needs help with the bookkeeping and payroll for his 2 stores.  One store burned down a year ago, was rebuilt and has now reopened.  He and my stepmom are back to working a full shift everyday and would like some help with the paperwork.  HUGE PRAISE!!!  Once I learn their system and get everything caught up, I should be able to do both of my jobs before I go to radiation each day!!!

Unfortunately, the money I wanted to set aside strictly for missions will have to be used for medical bills and most likely some household expenses now that my hours are being cut at the tax office.  And my husband may still need to get a 3rd job.

BUT.....all of this is just setting the stage for God and His incredible plans!!!  So, watch out!  God is about to perform miracles!  "You are the God who performs miracles;  You display Your power among the peoples."  Psalm 77:14 

**Some of the biggest miracles actually take place in our HEARTS rather than in our circumstances** 

And the reason I'm telling you more of my business than you ever wanted to know is so you can witness God's miracle(s) right along with me!  BUCKLE YOUR SEATBELT AND HANG ON!

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"Nothing in all creation is hidden from God's sight.  Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of Him to whom we must give account."  Hebrews 4:13

God makes me laugh!  This is my Bible verse for today.  I thought it was quite fitting after I just bared my soul to you about our finances!  GOD IS AMAZING!  

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8:14 p.m.
Radiation is going well.  Yesterday, I had my weekly x-rays and needed a few adjustments, but that is to be expected.  Today after my treatment, my skin started turning red for the first time.  It feels like a sunburn.  Dr. Bobo, my radiologist, said this was normal and that I would really notice skin changes in the next week.  He also said my fatigue will noticeably increase in the next week as well.

The most exciting thing though is the different women I've been meeting.  Early last week, I mentioned one lady in particular that I sensed God wanted me to spend some time with - I described her as being at the end of her treatments and being weary.  Well, I was able to talk with her at length last Friday.  She has a lot going on in her life, besides breast cancer.  God is allowing the two of us to talk every day now.  What a blessing! 

8:30 p.m.
When I walked in the front door this afternoon after radiation, I was greeted by a nice cool breeze.  The heat had gone out (again)!  The first time it happened was before Christmas, but it started working as soon as the technician got to our house!  He was able to show my husband a reset button in the attic that would prove to be useful for later.  But he was not able to detect the problem or fix it.

Today, another technician came and found the problem (PRAISE!) - even though the heat came right on for him too as soon as he got here!  So once the part is ordered, the weather dries up so the part can be installed, and we pay more than $600, we will have regular heat again!!!  SWEET! 

Yes, we are obviously doing something right at the Swicegood household.  Otherwise, our finances would not be such a target!  I'm telling you, the stage is being set for GOD TO DO SOMETHING BIG!!!  Something only He can do.  TO GOD BE THE GLORY!  Stay tuned.

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy


  

God Makes Me Giddy!!!

"Give thanks to the LORD, call on His name:

make known among the nations what He has done."

1 Chronicles 16:8

This morning, I had a doctor's Divine appointment at Dr. Frenette's office in Uptown Charlotte.  Dr. Frenette does the medication side of oncology (chemotherapy, oral meds, etc.)  I was there to discuss taking the oral medication tamoxifen for the next 5 years as a preventative measure.  But, most everyone else was there for chemo.

Before I arrived, I had asked God to please give me an opportunity to minister to someone while I was there.

As I was checking in, I glanced over at the waiting room and someone caught my eye.  She looked familiar, but I wasn't sure that I knew her.  She had on dark glasses and a germ mask covering her nose and mouth.  Even though I couldn't see her face, I recognized that blonde hair!  It was the very 1st lady I ever met at radiation.  I met her the day I went to get tattooted & fitted.  Here is what I blogged about her 2 1/2 weeks ago.....

As I was leaving, I met another patient.  She was not doing well.  She shared a little of her story with me.  She said that her small cancerous spot was completely removed.  However, a very small spot was found in one of her lymph nodes.  When the surgeon went to remove that cancer, it broke apart into smaller pieces.

As a result, she is having to undergo both radiation and chemotherapy.  She said she just finished her first round of chemo which consisted of 8 straight days of treatment.  She said the side effects were horrible, and she could barely put her feet on the floor.  She has 3 more rounds of chemo left.  Round 2 starts in about 3 weeks.  And she is having radiation AT THE SAME TIME as chemo!!!  I cannot imagine.      

Please pray for her.  She does not want to do chemo anymore.  But she has a 12 year old daughter and knows that she has to do it.  She has beautiful thick blonde hair and knows it will fall out with the next round of chemo.  I do not know her name because our conversation was interrupted when the nurse needed me.  But God does.  So, please pray for her.

My heart broke for her that day, and I have been praying for her since then!  I tried to find her name on the check-in list at radiation, but the computer has us listed by time and last name only.  So, God brought us back together today - the day she was to start her 2nd round of chemo!!!!!

ONLY GOD!!!!!!!!

The waiting room was packed, but there was a seat open right across from her.  With a smile beaming from ear to ear on my face, I went over to her and introduced myself.  I was so excited to see her!  I was absolutely giddy!!!  I probably scared her more than the chemo did!!!  I could not contain myself!  I knew this was God at work!!! 

Her sister was with her and the 3 of us talked for at least 30 minutes!!!  I now know her name and was able to share what God had laid on my heart with her.  I gave her my contact info as well.  Her sister and I really tried to encourage her as she sat there waiting for her name to be called to start round two of chemo - the round she knows will rob her of her beautiful blonde hair and her strength.  But she is determined not to let it rob her of her dignity and hope.

As I was about to pray with her, the nurse called her name.  I promised her I would be praying while she was getting her treatment.  And that is exactly what I did.

How do I know this was a Divine appointment?  Well, I never should have been at this doctor's office in the first place!!!  Dr. Frenette sees patients at the cancer center with my surgeon Dr. White every Monday afternoon.  When Dr. White told me I needed to see Dr. Frenette, he said I would see the 2 of them TOGETHER!!!  I was supposed to see Dr. Frenette at the cancer center in March when I go back to see Dr.White!  But, someone in the appointment setting office gave me a separate appointment with Dr. Frenette at his office "by mistake"!!! 

ONLY GOD!!!!!  I am still giddy!  Oh how I love to watch God work!  HE IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!!! 

And by the way, Dr. Frenette is recommending that I NOT take tamoxifen!!!  He said given my specific circumstances and type of cancer, the best plan for me to fight reoccurrence is exercising (cardio) 5 times a week for 20-30 minutes and eating 5 servings of fruits & veggies every day.  And the side effects of eating right and exercising are all positive, unlike the side effects of taking tamoxifen.  WOW!

This was an answered prayer, especially for my husband who did not have a peace about me taking tamoxifen in the first place.

After leaving the doctor's office, I spent the rest of the day in a praise and worship session with my God!

And look what was for dinner.....

Hiding behind the box is my beautiful friend Lisa from MOPS.  THANK YOU LISA FOR A DELICIOUS, HEARTY DINNER TONIGHT!!!

And check out another little treat from God...

I have been craving a big biscuit for a few days now!  I do not know why.  But it's the truth.  THANK YOU AGAIN LISA!  I promise to start eating my fruits and veggies TOMORROW!

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy 

God's Love

 "See what great love the Father has lavished on us,

that we should be called children of God!

And that is what we are!"

1 John 3:1

Today, God showed His love for me through my husband.....

The raditation machine was due for its annual check-up today so my appointment time had to be changed to 7:50 a.m. (Have I mentioned I am NOT a morning person??!!!)  I found out about this change on Monday afternoon.  When I told my husband about it, he asked if he could come with me because he had Thursday off.

Let me just say that my husband NEVER has Thursdays off - except for today.  My radiation appointments are always in the afternoon - except for today.  This was definitely God's doing!

So, my husband went with me to radiation this morning.  Not only that, he also got a guided tour of the treatment room and was able to see me getting prepped on the table.  And the staff is absolutely fabulous!  They answered all of his questions and showed him all of the equipment.  Now he has a better understanding of what I do everyday. 

Why did I feel an extra dose of love today?

Well, I know my husband loves me and will do anything for me if I ask him to.  But, I am a pretty independent person who tends to handle things like going to radiation on my own.  The fact that my husband asked to come to radiation with me (instead of me asking him or needing him to come), could only mean one thing - he WANTED to come!  I was touched.  It made me feel lavished by God's love, especially after I realized how God had orchestrated our schedules to make it all happen.  I was soooo excited to have my husband with me!

I know this may not sound like a big deal, but God let it be a big deal for me today.  The super sensitive feelings I had were a gift to me from my Heavenly Father.  A gift of His love and a reminder of His lesson that we are not meant to do life alone.

Then, to cap off the day, Esmeralda from MOPS brought us a fabulous enchilada dinner that my family wiped out instantly!  THANK YOU ESMERALDA!!!  THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

"The family of God is a gift from God especially for times like these." 

-from "When God and Cancer Meet" by Lynn Eib      



Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,

Nancy

Radiation Day 2

My friend Cindy and I were able to resume walking this morning before I went to work, and the exercise made a noticeable difference in my energy level today.  PRAISE!  It wasn't until 8:30 p.m. that I felt really tired, and my body started shutting down. 

But before I go to sleep, I want to blog about a few things God did today.  I'll make it quick - yeah, right!

On my way to radiation today, I prayed for God to please give me an opportunity to share Him with someone while I was there.  When I walked into the office, I was greated by the 2 sweet ladies who work at the front desk.  Super Sweet Ladies.  One of them said "Mrs. Swicegood, you always have a big smile on your face."  My response, "That would be the JOY OF THE LORD on my face!"  She gave me an "AMEN!" and said, "You keep right on smiling!"

In the waiting room, I actually met 3 new ladies today.  We each shared our "cancer detection" story in 30 seconds or less.  (It reminds me of college when you ask each other "what's your major?"  LOL!)  I was able to tell them about the miraculous way God uncovered my cancer, and how He has blessed me through the medical care I've received.  I prayed for 1 opportunity to share today, and God gave me 4 (when you include the lady at the front desk)!!!  ONLY GOD!!!!!

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."  Ephesians 3:20-21

I sense God wanting me to spend more time with one lady in particular.  She is about halfway through her treatments so I should be seeing her everyday for the next 3 weeks.  Please pray for us to have time to talk everyday.

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The radiation tech came and got me out of the waiting room, but asked me to sit in a chair in the hallway right outside the treatment room while another patient finished up.  While sitting in the hallway, I saw 2 tree pictures on the wall - one to my right and one to my left.  (Sorry I couldn't take pictures.  My camera was in my locker.)

As I looked at the 2 pictures, God spoke to my heart and said "What do you notice about these 2 tree pictures as well as the other tree pictures you have seen in this office?"

I thought about it for a minute, and then God revealed it to me.  None of the pictures are of just ONE tree by itself.  Every picture has SEVERAL trees in it.  And just like these trees, we were not meant to be alone.  We need each other.  God designed us to do life together.  From the very beginning, God said it is not good for man to be alone!  So, He created another person.  WOW!

Thank you for going through breast cancer with me!!!  Thank you for not leaving me alone!!!  WHAT A TREMENDOUS BLESSING YOU ARE!!!  

Ironically, earlier today at work before radiation, I was listening to the radio.  The DJ announced the next song was by TREE 53.  Of course the word "tree" caught my attention, and I wondered what this band's name meant.  I automatically assumed that the "tree" part referred to the cross Christ died on for our sins.  As I thought about the crucifixion, God spoke to my heart and said "the tree (cross) that Christ died on represents the place of TOTAL SURRENDER.  Jesus gave up His will for My (God's) will.  Are you totally surrendered to Me today?"

Ahhh, the lessons we can learn from trees!

Loving HIM with all my heart & soul,
Nancy